Stoneburner Gaming SMP Minecraft Server IP

What's up. We got magnets and a wizard with substance abuse problems.

Stoneburner has had a name change or two, but have consecutively hosted at least one minecraft server since 2009 (Classic Australian Minecraft Server REPRESENT).

That sounds like we're about to give you a salc1 2b2t intro, but it actually means i'm having a mid-life crisis and taking it out on you players by making you watch me fly a goat around your girlfriend's birch plank house.



Uh yeah, we're a survival server in the sense that new players are stuck in survival while we throw things at them. I'm not gonna lie, most of the staff team have been with us for over 10 years now, and kinda sick of making wood>stone>iron>diamond tools and farming sugar cane like a Korean basket weaver for 6 days to get an enchanting table, so if you want a RAW, EARNED, JUST AS THE SWEDISH SAUNA ENTHUSIASTS INTENDED pure vanilla gameplay, we're not for you anymore. Don't be that one dude that just begged in chat for items for 6 hours then left when finally told no, but like idk, don''t want to have to clear out a stupid hill in the way of your wheat farm? I'll bring the worldedit, you bring the pizza. I'll straight up give you whatever, within reason, just don't tell PMC what we keep in the tavern at spawn.



We've historically relied mostly on our own content, but we still use some notable plugins written by hyper-intelligent young twenties code monkeys that we've either purchased or replicated, including:



Regular guns from the 'real world', some space guns that were ripped from Skyrim with guns, my own brand of cyber weaponry which was just an excuse to rapid-fire 18-round laser-themed rockets at high velocity (good for mining or bullying kids who login and complain about "eww you use x plugin i'm 13 and still use pex so I'm better PMC said you have to give me OP you guys suck come to my server and buy the $200 rank so i can afford the new valorant agent REEE")

Something about a wireless storage system idk. Did I mention magnets? Took me 2 weeks, don't even use them, just thought it was cool to have magnets.



The magic plugin. I hate the magic plugin, but one of the other admins doesn't, so we're in a cold war of he keeps using it and I keep DM'ing him daniel radcliffe in a dressing gown with his home address imposed over it.


One really interested admin helps you make your own TARDIS, which is less like a house and more like a pocket dimension that travels around in all the other dimensions. Also, I can't be assed listening to the timey wimey chuds whinge when we are forced by the previously mentioned sauna enthusiasts to reset the overworld, so I'm pretty sure any player with a TARDIS still has their items from like 2015 onwards. It's whatever.




There's a bunch of other stuff, most of it hyper-specific because I thought it would be really fun to let players snort redstone etc.

I'm not about to print a whole list of everything we've got going, especially because I still want a PMC account in the future.




I hope you now share my feeling of not knowing wtf this server is. We got some cool buildings though. Come say hello, make some friends, and make an enemy or two if you want to spice things up. Don't stress about urgency, we're not going anywhere anytime soon.

Oh yeah no donor ranks btw, no donations at all. Our entire rank structure is proudly supported by nepotism, favoritism, and you being too polite to remind anyone that you should probably have a higher rank by now.



Rule one wheaton's law, go google it.

Rule two is don't be afraid to just join and swing your golden sword around, I can't stand players that play a server like an office job looking to get a promotion under the admin's desk. If you've read this far, tag a guy called @TinkTheTank and call him a mean name. Then DM me proof at Baivo#6165, i'll give you a free set of unbreakable diamond armour and tools, or a glock or something.